Re-introductions aren’t awkward - they’re necessary. Here’s how to make them.
Years ago, I was that person who had at least 4-6 in-person networking/social events a week. At the time, my work was centered around finding internships and work-based learning opportunities for high school students. I'd also ask people to come talk about their jobs in classrooms.
After getting ghosted by email, I realized it was more efficient to pitch our non-profit programs in-person while schmoozing by the cheese table. 🧀
There was always this guy I kinda hid from because I knew once he saw me, he'd make his way over and reintroduce himself to me. I knew how long he'd been in his career, how he got started at the company, and the projects he was working on.
As “meh” I'd feel about these interactions, eventually we ended up collaborating because I remembered what he did and knew he'd be the perfect person. (I feel like this should end with me saying I married this guy, but I married someone else. lol 😉)
By not re-introducing yourself, you’re assuming the person will remember you.
I know the last thing you want to do is elicit an eye-roll when you're talking to someone you (kinda) know. I get it! But by NOT reintroducing yourself, you're assuming this person is going to remember you! And if they don't, that they'll have the confidence to ask you to remind them.
Think about it - when was the last time you ran into someone, couldn't remember their name, and then felt too embarrassed to ask?
My point is to not assume that people know who you are and what you're up to (career-wise or otherwise). Instead, remind them by reintroducing yourself.
How to re-introduce yourself and not make it awkward.
When they ask how you've been, instead of giving a canned response about being busy or however you typically try to take the focus off yourself, try something like:
“Things are good! These days I'm excited about [thing you've been working on / doing for fun / whatever]. As you may remember, I'm [whatever role/thing you want to highlight].”
If you're job/opportunity searching, you might add something like:
“Actually, I'm happy we ran into each other. I've been meaning to ask you [if you know someone I can talk to about [whatever you need support with].”
The strength of weak ties when it comes to finding new opportunities - career or otherwise.
Why are making re-introductions important? Because of a theory known as the strength of weak ties.
Think of weak ties as those people you know casually. They're acquaintances you may run into a couple times of year and see their updates on social media, but otherwise they don't really occupy much of your brain space.
The Strength of Weak Ties is a paper published by sociologist and Stanford professor, Mark Sanford Granovetter.
“Its thesis is that weak ties—acquaintanceships that are not reinforced by many mutual friendships—are especially pivotal in the flow of information. It has become a core idea in the field of social networks.”
There has been increasing interest in Granovetter's research over the last couple of decades because of, well, the internet, and how digital our work and lives have become. In fact, LinkedIn's “People You May Know” algorithm has been studied to see how effective this is to job mobility.
One conclusion from the researcher's experiments: …”the weakest ties had the greatest impact on job mobility, whereas the strongest ties had the least.”
Beyond posting on LinkedIn (which I talk about here, here, and here), I think it's worth mentioning these reintroduction opportunities tend to happen spontaneously, situations like:
picking up your CSA or your kid from school
in the hall between meetings or at co-working spaces
while walking the dog
on Zoom when you and another person are the first to arrive and it feels awkward
How to prepare for re-introduction moments.
As the re-introducer, prepare your re-introduction with these two prompts:
What feels important to share right now?
What is an ask I have or something I can offer?
As the initiator, prepare for these impromptu conversations by making it more comfortable for the other person to reintroduce themselves to you. You could ask something like:
“Hey, what are you up to these days?”
“What's exciting you these days?”
I know how cringey it can feel to re-introduce yourself, especially when you’re someone who avoids small talk. If I’m at a networking event (online or in-person), I remind myself that I took the time to get myeslf at the event, so why not get the most I can out of it. That includes making sure that the people “in the room” know who I am, what I have to offer, and if I have an ask - to make it. The worst thing that could happen is that the person you are re-introducing yourself to remembers you!
And then you have yourself a feel-good moment. 💙
